Dear Daughter,

Dear Natalie,

This letter should come to you as no surprise, as I hope the years we have spent so far together have been joyful and light-hearted. As you turn 16, I hope we are closer than ever because today though you are unborn I find myself closer to you than ever.

I met your father when I had almost given up on the idea of happily ever after, I am a hopeless romantic and there were nights I prayed to God to change me but in the end I always hope for the kind of love that enriches life and not sucks you dry. We met at a book reading, nothing fancy but he found me pleasant and charming, fun-loving yet stern, my awkwardness, and eeriness he considered creepy yet endearing. He worships the ground I walk on and even till date when I am not looking I catch him staring at me as though he can’t imagine his luck for having found me. As you know your pa was hell-bent on ending up alone but the thought of living life without me made him take the plunge.

I hope you never get to the point of giving up, or settling for less than you deserve because you need a hug. I know today that thought seems ridiculous but believe me it happens to the best of us, I dated lots of great men and boys but my heart never felt such joy as the day I had you ( in my mind you were conceived first), you made me rediscover purpose and you are a result of a mind-blowing love.

Someone asked me what is so bad with my reality that I am stuck on fairy tales; he obviously hasn’t read lots of books. fairy tales teaches us hope despite what life throws at us, the end is always happy. Why should I settle for ordinary when the extraordinary is available?

Who wants a marriage of convenience? My quest for true love was filled with tales of woe and heartaches and pain but it was worth it. I wish I had been smarter with my heart, a little more patient in my decision-making process but I can’t spend eternity dwelling on the past. I loved and lost till I found a love that transcended imperfections and childish connotations, I found a friend and a lover, a champion and a warrior, I found my King and I wish that for you my dear.

When it comes to dealing with people:

Listen to their actions, not words

Never make haste to make a decision

A non decision is a decision

Friends first before lovers

Friendship shows true character and only out of that can you find love

Take your own advice, if your heads says its wrong it probably is

Never regret trying

If you fail, don’t give up, try again

People make time for things they love

If you can’t see their souls they are not worth it

If you won’t do the work don’t start

Never toy with anyone’s feelings

Be honest and brave

Guard your heart and your soul, never lose it no matter how bad the other person treats you, remain you

Never mind the ones who make you feel ordinary. You are a miracle, a result of a love people consider impossible. Everyday, I thank GOD for the privilege of having you, so don’t let a two-piece hack tell you different.

If there ever is a man alive who doesn’t think you are enough; he probably isn’t enough for you either so don’t cry too long. For the right man you will be enough.

Don’t let the clusters of people’s past get you stuck in a nightmare, their history isn’t yours, you are great and are loved. Today and always and if no one tells you in this lifetime, I am your mother and I love you to bits.

Forever,

Mum

My Romantic heart is Dead

This maybe the last piece I will ever write on love; as my quest has been tumultuous and time consuming and has led to no fruition. I achieved nothing in this quest except the bitter truth that love is not enough.

The reality is that love works under certain conditions for it to be true, timing must be appropriate, family has to approve (if not you both feel shunned), history at least for the girl must be the barest minimum, your occupation should be noble and your background should be similar or close enough.

New requirements include social media status, the number of likes on the girls page should be equal to that of her mans, society approval of compatibility is key, don’t forget music lovers must stick together #Artgang

What happened to soul compatibility?

What happened to the honesty of a kiss that’s unadulterated by lust?

What happened to the clear indications of happiness? Talking to that person forever and not noticing time fly by?

What happened to hugs that warm up your heart?

What happened to similar hunger to succeed?

What happened to the quest for knowledge and renewed passion?

What happened to true friendship?

What happened to someone who makes you feel safe by saying hello. What happened to what we feel?

Are we all destined to be cowards? Where are the poets? Who wrote sonnets of unrequited love, what happened to Shakespeare’s tale? Is romance dead with the jet age or are our hearts too weak to fight for what we feel?

Am I the only one clueless on the joke? Is true love dead?   The answer doesn’t matter I am all out of tricks and I am laying my heart to rest for only my unborn will ever reawaken her to the maximum capacity. no man’s words, caresses will ever inspire her resurrection.

I am Florence Warmate and my romantic heart is dead.

Goodnight.

Untoward Proclivity

He haunts my dreams, as I roll in the sheets,

This Magnum Man, dark chocolate inside and light caramel outside,

Tough and mush, he melts me every time we lock eyes,

I crave immortality to have power to spend indefinite lives with you,

All Man yet his eyes are so kind, my kind,

He conflicts me, He clicks with me,

Troubles me, fires me,

Drives me to the borders of insanity when I’m away from him,

When he’s with me time stands still,

He’s my pseudo persona,

The male me,

Such a Diva yet brave, determined, focused, tough and ambitious,

An artist constantly making things beautiful,

He makes me all woman,

What was life before him?

Without him I feel bereaved, a widow of his love,

With a single stroke of my hair,

He unnerves me,

This Is Voodoo,

Some black Magic,

He’s a bad man, bad man,

I can’t tell his good side from his bad side,

I am like waffles in his arms, spread chocolate all over me baby, eat me !!

I need this,

The cleanse can’t cleanse you,

Yoga can’t fix this addiction,

Baby, give me one more shot of you,

I crave toxic, I crave you,

lets do this

Reality can wait, let’s do this!!!!

Daniel Thompson

I accidentally ran into an ex recently, Daniel Thompson, 36 , Brown eyes , Bulky build, and he wore his ring like handcuffs . He looked downtrodden. Perhaps, that’s how I choose to see him. We exchanged pleasantries and not long after. He asked me “Still single right? “. He had this sadness to his eyes; it wasn’t the judgmental stare that my married female friends give me when the see me at the mall on Saturday with my shorts and tank top. He looked genuinely worried, we dated a while back but it never got to the point where I could say I do or he would drop on one knee and ask the question. We had a kind of love but we kept our lives separate and never overindulged in each other’s affairs, no jealous squabbles (A very mature relationship some would say) of course, I found it boring that, he would never throw me on the bed and kiss me till I run out of breath. I found it annoying that he could never lose his calm when I was stubborn for no good reason. It felt like a business transaction to me and I promised me long ago if it’s not a fiery all-consuming love I would never marry. (We all know why, I am still single now). He grabbed my hand and I followed him, I said good-bye to my shopping cart and looked forward to tea and salad.
After, the red-haired waitress took our order after grilling us over and over about mayonnaise. He began to tell his story ” Evelyn and I dated shortly after I met you, she is a doctor (he looks to me as though I should know this so I nod) and her deposition when we were dating was one full of care and nurturing (he lowered his eyes again, he had complained that I wasn’t caring because I didn’t make a fuss every time he told me about his hypochondriac symptoms). We dated 2 years and got married. She was a virgin ( I smile, interesting) . After the honeymoon she got pregnant and we had our daughter Shelia. She quit work and decided to be a stay at home mum and I agreed because I loved her (yea, right). After giving birth to Shelia, she moved to the baby room and eats, sleeps breathes the baby. (Where is he going with this?) .I get a nanny Matilda to assist Shelia with the chores so we can bond and now she factors Matilda into everything. I got home from work earlier today and found them in bed together so I stormed off and ended up here. What do you think I should do Clara?”(I try to speak but I say nothing& thank God I am single, at times like this no attachment looks good, while preparing me to give advice that I am not qualified to give).

Carrie

Carrie started to beat herself up after hanging up the call . Jake made her feel dumb but she felt an unexplained bond to him. He has the nicest eyes and whenever she looked into them she felt she could bare her soul to him. Jake is the regular guy next door and they got along fine as friends till he kissed her one drunken night. Since then they have had the most torrid affair and she couldn’t get herself to stop. She blames the eyes.

Jake sat in his backyard wearing his knickers and multi colored socks with a wind cheater , he looked puzzled. what was that call about? I love this woman and she loves me why cant we get along? He made his way into his bungalow and shut the door behind him , As he hung his coat he reminisced how they met. It was the summer of 1988 then all the young girls came out to the country to have some good fun and he saw her walk down the street in brown khakis and a yellow and white jump suit, her hair was a mess and she wore white sneakers with red polka dot socks . she looked adorable and clueless. he walked up to her and asked “hello miss , did you ,misplace your dog?” she smiled and replied ” no sir, I am on my way to the bakers to get you baked “. They both laughed and became fast friends.

Carrie hated being mad at anyone but this emotional dance was turning her into a monster , so when she heard the ping from her phone she decided to ignore and increased the Beyoncé’s irreplaceable song coming from her mac book. Her apartment could use some sprucing up and she decided to do just that. As she dusted she heard the vibrating sound from the phone and she picked up . Hello , hello Jake are you there? said Carrie.

“Will you marry me Carrie?” said Jake . The next few seconds that followed were so silent that a million angels could have run errands, then Carrie said  “oh wow , Jake wow,… (a million thoughts flew through her mind ) we should talk about this sometime, I got to go”.

My Forever

Dear My Forever,

 

How was your day ? A nightmare ? I hope not. Work was fine but thoughts of you crossed my mind . Le Lover , Boo , its taking forever for us to be together and since my first letter to you several experiments have happened. I seem to find bits of you in different men but not all of you. I was with Sammy the other day and I kept thinking how perfect it would be if the both of you knew each other and we could all be friends. I love you and I have since I created the idea of you my love.

I have written poems for you , dreamed of birthing a son and daughter for you. Raising a family with you but you remain in my dreams and are constantly hiding from my reality. Are you ashamed of me ? I’m I not good enough for you ? Are you chasing your own fairytale as I have chased you for years? Do you love me?

I wait for you when I line up at the bank to pay my bills, I look for you when the traffic lights turn red. At the pub the other day I kept starring at the entrance waiting for you to walk into my life. Baby, for real why do you walk so slow?  I stole a hug from Brian he feels warm and comfortable and he makes me laugh with his funny impressions. Are you Brian?

Baby, talk to me , I am tired of waiting for my love life to start . I am bored of kissing frogs to find my prince, I want to wake up next to you every morning and kiss you good night everyday. I want to make love to you with every ounce of my body and love you as though today is my last . Please let me love you. Please come home to me , send me a ping, an email or a text or pick up the phone and say hello.

I love you and I am waiting for our future to begin

 

Love always,

Love

Happy Holiday Santa

The holidays started out with the office secret Santa . I picked a girl and she was easy , so I didn’t have to worry too much about the gift . I moved on to other pressing issues : who was I going to spend the holidays with? I don’t want to rush things my name is Lily Tudor , I have big brown eyes and I drown men in them. I am well built and love my burger and fries . I am the girl next door but a very hotter version than some Susan, I am a cross breed of  your regular elegant chic and the tom  boy streak . I am perfect lets move on.

I work as a fashion consultant in a medium scale firm ( I am a sales rep in a large retail chain to be honest but it sounds cooler to say fashion consultant) . I met dru weeks ago at a bar on the mainland , I was out with my buddy Renee and Dru came to chill and we hit it off instantly. He’s not ordinarily my type( he’s not overly communicative, a jerk or a womanizer) . we chatted and surfed 3 bars together and at 4.30 am we were besties.

He didn’t ask for my number but when he called me the next day I wasn’t surprised , The silent types are usually resourceful. we started hanging out ( that’s a lie, hanging indoors together doing the crossword puzzles and indoor games). we spent a lot of time surfing each others aesthetic features but not really sealing the deal. spending time together became some kind of addiction . The intensity of the attraction could burn a bystander yet we were not a couple.

We started hanging outdoors with friends and tried to get the attraction out of the way with several hours of trying but the more we tried the more we felt. It was like magnets . Inseparable when in close proximity . This had been going on for three months till I met George , George is a lawyer with impeccable credentials. A straight shooter and we hit it off too . His was more of an intellectual hit off . we were mentally compatible. I couldn’t get myself to think of George outside the box. I like him outside the box and couldn’t think of Dru anywhere else but inside the box. who am I to spend the holidays with?

Tonight at 8pm . I am going to ask Dru over. I will greet him in a black lace corset with lace trimmings detailing at the bust, my skin oiled to perfection with Johnson petroleum jelly. My hair all bouncy and coiled , my lips properly glossed  , my eyes  will be made smoky with dark eye shadow, Asos see through stocking and Zara nude Peep toes with a splash of D & G the one around my neck . I will look into his deep blue eyes and ask will you spend the new year eve with me ?

Miles

Sitting at her desk, As a sales  person sitting isn’t really a big part of her job but she had to sit as she thought of him.  Miles with his perfect caramel skin, broad shoulders, his perfectly chiseled facial bones , his lips that seemed like they could ignite fire if they touched any part of her body, the innocence that radiates from his eyes when he smiles , she gasped  and let out a  soft mmmh from her soft lips as they parted.  smiled . She Wants and when Laura Andrew wants she usually gets .( a tiny voice in her head said not this time, she brushed it off).

Work has been a nightmare recently , she woke up to work & slept to the thoughts of work .  she hadn’t had drinks for weeks now and her legs were a mess . she hadn’t shaved in weeks . wow!!!  no wonder he blew me off ( she thought about miles a lot )  He hadn’t called after their surprised meet. she needed moral support and decided to call sally to her rescue.

Sally heard the vibrations on her desk but she could reach for the phone in this position. Her back was arched against her desk, her pencil skirt almost invisible and brain was having her for breakfast . Ahhh , she said but the phone wont stop ringing, she looked down at brain and said” darl, would you be a dear and pass me the phone?” he looked dazzled, “really now? ” he said and she smiled . As he passed her the phone he started to adjust his shirt  in a manner that said I have some dignity left  but in true sally fashion she said “rain check? ” and answered the phone.

“Hey you, sup? I was in the middle of my lunch break , this had better be important girl..” sally said. As Laura began the tale of Miles she listened to her friend and fiddled  with her pencil skirt , damn I may be adding weight .

Laura  had grown up in a middle class family , with a father who doted on her and her sister and cheated on her mother every second he had. she was raised as a good catholic girl and every now and again rewarded for

Laura Andrews

 

As Laura Andrews wore her favourite pink heels out of her apartment she knew today would be the day men prayed to God for a miracle. She strutted them like a pro off the runway. Her date was with her newest broker Mr. Miles Mufasa, He is of south African descent but born and raised in England , so you could taste his accent when he smiled . His perfume was delicate yet masculine a perfect british lay . Her Phone a samsung galaxy S3 rang and she danced a little to the tune with her shoulders swaying from right to left ( of course it was the beyonce’s song “who runs the world? ” girls song) . Immediately she heard his voice her inside resolve started to melt away , she wanted this man to touch her core .There was something in his voice pulling her towards him .she didn’t realize that he was cancelling their date till he said ” rain check darling”. who does that ? get a girl hot & bothered and cancel because you have a blablabla… meeting with your bosses friend. she sighed ,these heels can’t go to waste. she started scrolling through her whatsapp for the next available cutie. she let out a subtle chuckle at the name Leman Banks. They had met at a mall a few weeks ago and had coffee but she didn’t see potentials with a man who cared more about his looks than her but she was a beggar at this point so she can’t choose, so he would do for tonight. she sent him a blushing smiley and after the pleasantries : she told him that she was up & about and wanted to do dinner at his .. Did he mind? of course he said HELL nO.. (who are we kidding?) she rang alicia and told her not to wait up, and headed towards Vain Leman . As she rung the bell , she began to doubt her actions, was this rushed , too impulsive and then decided whatever we only live once. As Leman opened the door he looked as usual : smart casual sexy , smelled like bvlgari man extreme, she gave him a side hug and a peck on the cheek. She showed herself to the sitting area and there was Miles …………. To be Continued…..

suzy Adams

Suzy stood tall over 6ft and 3inches as she towered over me , I couldn’t help but stare into her big brown eyes .They look sad as always . I smiled and alighted from the car and gave her a big hug. We were all having a crappy week but I am going to keep my thoughts to myself for once and listen to her ( that’s friendship) . She just learned that Jide was married and their 7months perfect romance was over because last night his wife came back to town to surprise her hubby and rained down insults on the both of them ( I knew jide was married but I didn’t tell her because I had no proof other than my gut feeling and his annoying smile whenever  I meet him). A lying scum bag .

she kept raining insults on him and my mind began to drift , I spent Tuesday with Patrick , A Lawyer (semi refined man) but at my age I have to compromise a little . He dotes over me but I cant see a relationship growing from our numerous lunch dates. I don’t feel the passion and he said something about spending a weekend together . I am definitely not going any where private with that man ( I giggle and suzy looks at me ).

I know its not funny her predicament but as my good friend lola says “when its too good to be true, it isn’t true ” . Jide met suzy at the infamous Turquoise car wash . its where all the crème de la crème go to wash their cars . she drives a range rover sport and likes everyone to know it. it took four years and hustling to get her the range .

Jide was all over her immediately ,  they had dinner at  dunes and breakfast at vanilla, he shopped for her all over the place they were an item in a couple of weeks. everyone envied them except his friends and hers( me).

They made love for the first time in Dubai at the famous Burj Al Arab, she sent me a selfie  of herself in the Jacuzzi. I warned her that things seemed to be growing too fast , she called me a pessimist.

she snapped her fingers at me and said ” you haven’t heard a word I said ” . “of course , I did” I replied and started telling her about my latest catch mr  Brown Daniels . I told her it would take her mind off him

Brown Daniels is a chef , he owns a little restaurant I often go to eat lunch, he wears glasses but every time we have eye contact I shy away . recently , he asked for my number so randomly that I was unsure if it was romantic or business.

he invited me for dinner and after the soufflé ,  I let him have me three times on the restaurant floor. Suzy started to laugh and called me the S** word but who cares ? that’s how to have a man and a meal without complications.