The lover and I have been reunited after several strained Internet conversations,phone calls , texts, a 7hours flight and a 2hour train ride.
I haven’t seen sunlight in days, I think I maybe going dark. The endless texting is no longer required. I lie next to him in bed and I feel inspired. I am alive!!!!!
The passers by look so sad as I watch them through the window. Who has what I have?
I have missed his scent on the sheets, his muffled grunts in his sleep. My lover 🙂 I never get tired of the sound of that.
After 105hours of unbridled passion reality has caught up with me. Now I want to step out of bed and paint like Picasso, or sing like Whitney .In this moment I am torn between happiness and the fear of loosing myself.
I want to escape my womanhood; the clutches of my biological clock and love this man but I hear voices of my babies unborn and I am torn. I want to embrace the strength that makes me want his love to move mountains.
I want to be woman and wolf!! Free & not alone, married & not shackled. I want to be an achiever yet a giver, truly a lover and mother.
How do I find balance? How do I find me?